would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
