Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
