I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
