no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I deserve this hangover.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
