HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
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