Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I could fuck to npr.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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