Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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