i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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