You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Don't make out with my wife yet
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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