dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
