It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
