You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
