I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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