but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
