I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
