party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize