Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize