She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
