I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
