I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
