i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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