i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
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