I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
