ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
