Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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