god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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