and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Someone shattered a urinal.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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