just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize