Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize