That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
he thought i was a dude.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
