Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
YAS. BRING CRAB.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
