I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize