Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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