Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i already hear my dad disowning me
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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