Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize