if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
