kristin has been a bad kristin
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
