you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
