You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize