like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
