In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
