There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
