So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
