Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Randomize
