BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
