pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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