Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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