My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
