we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Duck Duck Cougar?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
