how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
