I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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